Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Luza here

Bob’s me’Uncle (and so was Bob I, Bob II, Bob III, Bob IV and so on but since you are reading this you can call me Luza me’Uncle)
And this is the original true honest to Aunty Huia fearing blog of Luza me’Uncle...
Since we are being so straight up here, I have to admit to finding this a bit of a naff experience as we me’Uncles are more noted for our oratory rather than our written skills so this blogging business really ain’t up we me’Uncles alley if you know what I mean …
But for the sake of team spirit I will do me utmost and suck it up for the next wee while and participate in a completely open manner on this journey of learning 2.0 but a warning to ya Kelly if I don’t get me ipod there will be trouble at the end of the rainbow, as we me’Uncles have numerous cuzzies in very low and dark corners of this earth and the planets that surround (a bit like the local mafia..) so let me make it clear now Kelly there is no where to hide if I don’t win me ipod!!
Strewth mate I figured I would be cunning and let the rest of the collegues tortuers bozos office lot trail blaze and clear the rough spots outta the way but no such luck… as strike me down with the curse of the warriors!
The nuttas I mean the IT wannabes blocked blogger.com (well how helpful is that but then again its pretty much par for the course when you are at work driving a Mark II engine instead of the V8 you have left at home – ah well at least I gotta a taste of how the punters experience the Learn.net)
Well I got over the D’oh! moment pretty smartly as only cousin Homer Jay was in the office at the time otherwise the rest of the bozos office lot probably would have turned the air blue with their colourful lingo.
Just quietly mate the lingo here is so colourful that before I leave work to go home me Aunty Huia IV, telephones me everyday to remind me to wash out my ears and mouth in me’Uncles kerosene (it has to be me’Uncles as Aunty don’t believe in that Home Brand stuff as she reckons its diluted H20, personally I am not sure whether kerosene and water are such a great combo but no one in their left mind argues with Aunty Huia... but I best stop before I start digressing...)
Anyways like I was saying I waited and waited and waited and waited for the great moment to register my blog as by this time I was pretty excited, since the way the bozos office lot were yakking, I figured this was going to be right up there with the time my great great great Bob’s me’Uncle III and Aunty Huia of Ti-Kouka met the Prime Minister of the Republic of Wotru. If you know your history (like all us me’Uncles) you would know that historic meeting was in the same stratosphere as the President of Whatsmineisyours gifting Bob’s me’Uncle I, me’Uncle Island, but whatta ya know the bozos office lot had LIED to me it wasn’t even close it was one big fat yada, the ole zilcharoo from the McRoos dog food factory.
Mainly it was the waiting and waiting. A bit similar to a decision I once made to go on the Picton ferry - unfortunately I ended up spending all day in the terminal waiting...but then again maybe waiting is a holiday thing?
But tar me with the skin of a plastic boa constrictor what made it worse was this geezer having the nerve to email and say use the learn.net pcs if a site is blocked on the staff pc – hulloo… this is the holidays? dude have you tried getting on a learn.net pc in the holidays?? D’oh!
So by this stage I was getting mighty brassed off as the dog and cat were at home and I had nothing to kick…but never fear what with me being one of the smarter me’Uncles, I knew I needed to cool down and take a walk around the library and think happy thoughts as it is only day 3 of the holidays.
Here I was on my walkabout thinking happy thoughts… when inspiration struck in the most unlikely way – I was able to push a kid of the Opac for playing games on it instead of leaving it free for the catalogue and people joining up.
AAhh! Just as the joy of being mean was warming the arteries of me frigid heart, and no sooner had the punk pushed off the booming voice of my long departed cuzzie Darth V me’Uncle called out to me saying "if you use it to register your blog the ipod will be yours" well we me’Uncles are a loyal lot so really I had no choice but to get on blogger.com through the Opac and bugger the staff pcs/learn.net pcs nonsense.
So here you have it I have registered and done the silly post but honestly I have had more fun watching the paint dry on the fence posts penning in Pinetree me’Uncles prize bull from impregnating Aunt Daisy’s prize cow Maisie ...
But never mind we me’Uncles are made of stern stuff and are not ones for sulking (unlike the Springfield cousins) and instead this Luza will persevere for the booty that Kelly has promised at the end of the rainbow.
Btw, Kelly could you please make sure the frog leg club sandwiches aren’t part of the prizegiving? As the last frog leg club sandwich got stuck in me two front teeth and I ended up not being able to give me thank you speech, and me Aunty Huia was a tad annoyed and gave me a knock around the ears, and ever since then when I walk I hear a rattling sound like something is loose in me head which is a little discombobulating…but what the heck once I get me new ipod it should balance out the rattling and everything should be sweet as - just like smelling like me Aunty Huia’s chester drawers, after surviving the floods of ’94 but that’s another blog...
straight up from Luza’s mouth as always


1 comment:

Princess Smutty said...

HAHAHA. Love it!! OK... there are two clues here... ONE. The 'Munns' Mafia and TWO. You used an OPAC computer to create your blog... EYE think EYE know who EWE are... and if it IS EWE, I salute you.. My dear, you are a creative genius!! If it isn't you... it's back to the 'Clue-DOH' board... 'REWA HARD!